Are we everlasting? Sometimes I think not all is finished ever. And that we carry on even when gone, as our memories were never made in vain, I hope.
I fortunately associate the song that was playing in the background, the delicate or strong scent, the vivid colours, with the special moment I was blessed with. Thus, whenever I encounter these now attributes of the event I get the chance to re-enter the past and re-live those memories as if in a trance, and in a somewhat of a melancholic state of mind. It is sometimes hard to let go of them and so, the fact that it is only a re-played record I get to experience, I am stuck in between times. I long to find the tranquility that characterized some memories, the happiness found in some others, and the presence of those long gone in forgotten times. Also, as I make memories, I wonder whether these will become the new ideal, the ones I'd rather go back to whenever I encounter hardships in life.
I'll have my pictures as well. And I'll tell anyone who is kind enough to listen how much I loved that Christmas tree or how much wonderful the scented candle made everything feel. One day these moments will be worth even more than we can imagine, and when they're filled with happiness and laughter they may be the source of great stories which remind us we did not do anything in vain.
Admittedly, I have many things to remember from 2016- most of which, unfortunately, I'll try to keep away and out of my mind. This year was filled with stress, hardships, deaths and breakdowns and it felt like a never-ending tragedy, one which does not know the word "fin". However, I have encountered rays of hope and light among the moments of suffocation. These gave me hope and a reason to try to remember this year for more than sad endings. I am still trying to work on that aspect.
Yet, this Christmas season was magical. Past the sadness and the plummet, my life re-gained a little bit of colour and excitement for the day of tomorrow. The preparations gave me a push to wake up everyday and organize, the excitement of Christmas got me up a little bit from my darkness-filled routine and the decision to fully relax for the first time in years gave me the opportunity to accept that working hard at all times needs periods of self-healing too.
This Christmas season was filled with laughter, happiness and all kinds of heart-warming glitter. I experienced the excitement of putting up the tree and listening to Christmas Carols for the first time in years. I drank all kinds of sweet chocolate beverages and ate pastries to my heart's content. I enjoyed seeing lots of presents under the tree and I spent time with my family, watching Christmas movies. The feelings which filled the atmosphere during Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are still lingering in the air- and those help me wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
I sincerely hope that 2017 will bring happier times, times without anxiety, stress and worry.
No comments:
Post a Comment